summertime lessons

As a parent, I'm learning what it means to put my selfish wants aside for the good of Paisley's learning and growth.  Today was a day that I very much wanted to do what I wanted since it was so hot.  I do not do well in the heat.

Welcome to summers in the south where you can't breathe when you step outside and sweat started pouring down your back and off your brow.  Apparently children, at least my child, is immune to this stifling heat.  She loves being outside, which is a blessing, but also a curse.  Bugs love to eat her up, because let's face it.  She is too sweet.

Today we went swimming, which was lovely.  After we swam, she wanted to walk around the patio for a bit, and I decided that it would be a good time to water a few plants.  Paisley is a very good helper and naturally she wanted to help too.  My instinct was to tell her "no" since the hose was dirty.  Then I thought about what that teaches her:
-That I don't need her help.
-That I don't think she is capable enough to help.
-That I don't value her willingness to help.
Yes, she is only 2, but I try to think long term with her and how telling her "no" now will shape her into the adult she will become.  I also try to talk to her like she isn't a toddler. I am not a fan of "baby" talk and feel like for Paisley's sake she isn't developing like she needs to if we are always talking to her like a little baby.  This could be the reason why she is advancing so quickly, because she doesn't feel like a little baby.

So I decided that she could hold the hose while the pitcher filled up with water.  And she loved it!  She is so patient when it comes to helping me around the house and listens better than any other child, including myself, I've ever known.  I'd like to think we are "out of the woods" with Paisley feeling like she needs to constantly please us with the fear of leaving us making her following instructions as her natural behavior.  Orphans tend to obey every word their new parents tell them with the fear of leaving their new home or not being accepted into the family if they refuse to obey.  It's completely heart-breaking to think that Paisley could ever feel this way.

Paisley holding the hose in the pitcher as the water runs so Momma could water the plants.

After watering the plants, it was time for lunch.  We still give Paisley two choices throughout the day to help with her decision-making skills.  She is really advancing in being able to make decisions even though she repeats her choices several times before telling us her choice.  Today's "two choices" consisted of either #1 Sitting inside at the table to eat lunch or #2 Sitting at the table outside under the umbrella to eat lunch.  After repeating the choices a couple of times, she decided on #2 Sitting outside.

Ugh.  Yep, my thoughts exactly.  Why did I give her the outside choice in the first place?  I KNEW that she would pick eating outside in the 100 degree heat index weather, because she loves being outside.  Enough pouting, Leslie.  Suck it up and just eat outside.  In the late July heat.  While sweat is rolling down your face.  Flies are swarming all around.  Paisley is eating the slowest she has ever eaten before.

In fact, she was having a good ol' time with her ketchup.  Yes, Paisley, please stick all five fingers in your ketchup.  Proceed to laugh hysterically with the ketchup still on your fingers and start touching everything within your reach with your ketchup hand.

Again.  Another reminder, Leslie, to let her be a kid and play in the ketchup.  Clean up will come later.  For now, look at that sweet, smiling face.

Paisley and her ketchup fingers.

I've fought with myself more times than I would like when it comes to letting Paisley do things that I don't necessarily think are "fun" or "appropriate" behaviors.  It's a constant reminder that she is learning and exploring new things that she might not have been able to do prior to meeting us.  As long as she isn't in danger or putting other people's lives in danger, then why not let your 2 year old daughter help water plants and stick her fingers in ketchup?  The sense of accomplishment she will feel after helping and the smile on her face as big as Texas will be worth my stepping out of my comfort zone.

Leslie, have you ever seen a more beautiful or happy child?