straight ahead: sleepless nights

Do you know how hard it is to sleep at night knowing your child is half a world away?  Parenthood is filled with hard situations and circumstances on a daily basis.  Pregnancy is something I have yet to experience personally, but from what I have heard from those who have experienced it, pregnancy has good moments along with challenges at times.

The same goes with adoption only on a different scale.

Before we received PA (pre-approval) for Paisley, I imagined how hard its would be for me to leave her at daycare, go to big school, or even spend the night at family's houses.  To leave my little girl somewhere for any length of time without me was heart-breaking.  I never want her to be away from my side once we travel to get her.  However, I didn't fully think through was how hard it was going to be to now wait months before we will receive our travel assignment in order to go get her.  We are looking at 9-12 months before we will be able to see that sweet face in person.  I am already starting to experience restless nights sleeping, because our daughter is living on the other side of the world.  Let me put this in perspective:  she is currently 13 hours ahead of us.  When we are asleep, she is awake.  When we are awake, she is asleep.  And I have to go several months like this?  Knowing that our little girl is not with us?

I like to think she is safe in her orphanage being taken care of by nannies who love her as their own, but frankly that is naive of me to think that.  Daniel and I may never know what abuse (prayfully, none at all) she has/will experience during her time living in an orphanage.  We can't assume that she has lived a life of ease filled with days of arts-n-crafts, games, learning the alphabet, singing songs, being loved on.  Orphans are the lowest priority.  It is sad, but it's the truth.  Sure, these children are feed, put to bed, and clothed (for the most part), but they don't experience a childhood like you and I did.  For this very reason, my heart aches for Paisley to be here with us.  To be with her mom and dad who want her, to care for her, to love her, to provide for her, to spoil her, and to make sure she is never alone again.

Orphans live a rough life so why would we think they have it made?  They didn't chose this life, but someone else did for them.  They want to be loved and cared for.  They want to grow up and better the world by doing something meaningful.  Kids have dreams.  Big dreams.  Honestly, I am grateful more than anything to be given the opportunity to make a difference in one child's life.  And the sleepless nights will be more than I would like for them to be until we can bring her home.  However, each sleepless night will be completely worth it in the end.  So bring on the added wrinkles and dark, baggy eyes.  They are for our daughter.

So will you join us?  Please join us in praying for a few things.

1. Paisley.  Please pray for her, her health, her mental state, and getting prepared for a new life.
2. Daniel and me.  Please pray for rest, health, focus, motivation to do while we wait, and to share our story.
3. Paisley's nannies.  Please pray for the women (and men) who will care for her.  Pray for gentle words, touch, and care as they look after our daughter.
4. Funds.  It's sad that money is such a huge part of adoption, but it is.  And what's even more sad is knowing just how many families would love to adopt but can't due to the lack of funds.  Thankfully, God has provided for our adoption so far.  We have faith He will continue.  Please pray for us to think of new fundraisers to start, for people to participate in those fundraisers, and for others to spread the word about the fundraisers.  Without money, we aren't able to bring Paisley home.
5. The rest of our adoption process (mostly the paperwork/approval stage).  Please pray for ease in getting the rest of our documents completed and approval by both the US and Chinese governments.  Pray there will be no hold-ups and our documents will be approved with ease.

Like we always say, thank YOU for the continued prayers and support.  You are changing lives.  May God bless each of you for what you are helping to accomplish.